Don't argue with an Autistic Teenager at 3am...

I don't normally argue with my kids, especially not my daughter who has autism, but when I do, the result is priceless.

At  3am I got up to use the restroom and I heard my TV on down stairs. Passing by my youngest sons bedroom and seeing him sound asleep, and knowing that my oldest was staying at his boyfriends apartment, I knew that the culprit of the late night binge watching was my daughter, Rayne.
For those who are not familiar with my family or my kids, Rayne is almost thirteen and has moderate autism. She is lower functioning in some areas but cognitively is able to communicate pretty well, though she does at times, speak in broken English.
I was sitting on the toilet and I hollered down the stairs at her (the bathroom seems to be the best place in my house for family discussions. It's usually the time that everyone is fighting, needing advice, or asking me where something is). From my spot on the throne I informed her that she needed to be in bed and not watching television. This is the conversation that followed:

"What?"
"You know what, go to bed."
"Why?"
"Because I said so."
"Why?"
"Because it's nightime."
"Why?"
(Rolling my eyes) "Because it's not daytime yet."
"Why?"
"I don't know, because God thinks we need more sleep."
"Why?"
"It doesn't matter, just go to bed."
"What?"
"You heard me, bed now."
"Why?"
"I'm not playing this game with you, I said bed, now get your butt to bed."
"Why?"
Me ignoring her...
"Why?"
"Why?"
"Daddy...why?"
"Bed..."
"Why?"
"Bed!"
"Why?"
"Bed, now!"
"What?"
"You know what, bed!"
"Why?"
"Stop it! Just go to bed, I'm not going to tell you again!"
A moment of silence...
"Why?"
"Oh for Gods sake will you just go to bed please?!"
"Daddy?"
"Daddy?"
"Daddy?"
"What, Rayne??????" (Sighing).
"Why?"
"GO TO BED"
I hear her coming up the steps.
"Daddy?"
"Yes?"
"Can I go to bed?"
"Please do..."

Finally after a much heated debate about WHY she apparently has to do anything I tell her I was able to get her to go back to bed.
There are times when I want to rip my hair out and scream at the top of my lungs and then there are times when I reflect on something and laugh. This is one of those times.  It's true that she can be frustrating and having an autistic child isn't easy but she does make life fun and at least keep it interesting.  Even with all of her limitations she still has the attitude that makes her a true diva and I couldn't be prouder.